3 Times A Cheater « Result #1 on Mar 14, 2009, 4:47am »
Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, when Jack asks his wife, ¡°Betty, have you ever cheated on me?¡±
Betty replies, ¡°Oh Jack, why would you ask such a question now? You don¡¯t want to ask that question.¡±
¡°Yes, Betty, I really want to know. Please.¡±
¡°Well, all right. Yes, three times¡¡±
¡°Three?!? Well, when were they?¡± he asked.
¡°Well, Jack, remember when you were 35 years-old and you really wanted to start a business on your own, and no bank would give you a loan? But, then one day the bank president himself came over to the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?¡±
¡°Oh, Betty, you did that for me? I guess I can¡¯t be too upset about that. Well, when was number 2?¡±
¡°Well, Jack, remember when you had that last heart attack and needed that very risky operation that no surgeon was willing to perform? And, remember how Dr. DeBakey came all the way up here, to perform the surgery himself?¡±
¡°Betty, you should do such a thing for me, to save my life. To do such a thing, you must truly love me darling. How can I be upset with that?¡±
¡°So, all right then, when was number 3?¡±
¡°Well, Jack, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short?¡±
Religious Tits « Result #2 on Mar 14, 2009, 4:47am »
A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's, one of the largest department store chains. He shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said. 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife'
'What type of bra?' asked the clerk.
'Type?' inquires the man 'There is more than one type?'
'Look Around,' said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size color and material.
'Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only three types of bras,' replied the salesclerk.
Confused, the man asked what were the types.
The saleslady replied 'The Catholic type, the, Salvation Army type, and the Baptist type. Which one do you need?'
Still confused the man asked 'What is the difference between them?'
The lady responded 'It is all really quite simple. The Catholic type supports the masses, the Salvation Army type lifts up the fallen, and the and the Baptist type makes mountains out of mole hills.
Class Reunion « Result #3 on Feb 27, 2009, 2:32am »
I was minding my own business a few weeks ago when I got ¡°the call¡± -- that dreaded, shrill ringing of my telephone bearing news just short of a death in the family. It was a former high school classmate asking I disagreeistance in our 20-year class reunion.
Could it be 20 years already? I shuddered. Cold chills went up and down my spine as tiny beads of sweat popped out on my forehead. What had I done with my life the past 20 years? My mother told me I¡¯d have to deal with this some day,wow power leveling but I had laughed it off, just like I laughed off those embarrassing pink plastic curlers she used to wear in her hair. (I picked up a set at a garage sale just last week. Got a great deal on them, too!)
It¡¯s amazing how a brief phone call can totally turn one¡¯s life upside down. Suddenly, I began hearing those 1970s songs (now known as ¡°oldies¡±) in a different arrangement, realizing that Mick Jagger was over 50, ¡°Smoke on the Water¡± never did make any sense at all, and my ¡°Seasons in the Sun¡± had literally faded into oblivion. Had the sun set on me already?
I glanced in the mirror.wow power leveling (Okay, I stared in the d**ned mirror.) I examined every tiny little crevice and pore, starting with my hairline, down past those patronizing ¡°smile lines¡± to the base of my neck. No double chin yet, I thought.
The next few weeks were pure hell. Each day began with a grueling training program -- a 6:30 a.m. run in a futile attempt to bounce off that unsightly baggage that had somehow accumulated on my thighs overnight. I went shopping for the perfect dress -- you know, the one that would make me look 20 years younger. I found out that they stopped selling them around 1975. Three dresses later, I came to my senses.wow power leveling There was only one logical explanation: I was having a mid-life crisis.
I realized that the funny, crunching noise I heard each night as I climbed the stairs was really my knees. I had seriously considered adding potty training to my resume as one of my greatest accomplishments. Bran flakes had become a part of my daily routine -- and not because they were my favorite cereal.wow gold I held Tupperware parties just so I could count how many friends I had.
Life just hadn¡¯t turned out the way I¡¯d planned. Sure, I was happy. I had a wonderful husband and two great kids in the center of my life. But somehow, working part-time as a secretary and mom hardly fit my definition of someone my classmates had voted as wow gold¡°most likely to succeed.¡± Had I really wasted 20 years?
Just about the time I was ready to throw in the towel and my invitation, my seven-year old tapped me on the shoulder. ¡°I love you, Mom. Give me a kiss.¡±
You know, wow gold I¡¯m actually looking forward to the next 20 years.
Joined: Mar 2005 Gender: Male Posts: 1 Location: Osaka
Rihatsu « Result #4 on Mar 7, 2005, 10:03pm »
Username: Rihatsu
Character Name: Rihatsu Senthar
Race: Drow/Fallen Angel
Class: Rogue/Sorcerer
Gender: Male
Occupation: N/A
Age: 175
Deity: Loloth
Height and Weight: 5', 95lbs.
Armor and Weapons: Shell Armor, Elven Daggers, Two Wrist Mounted Daggers, Elven Longbow
Items and Special Items: Fan of Furious Flame: This collapsible fan is made of thin red iron and resembles licking flames when opened. Three times per day, the fan can create a cone 30 feet long that causes any open flames, including candles, torches, or lanterns, to explode in a burst of fire. All fire that explodes in this way is permanently extinguished. The explosion occurs too quickly for nearby combustibles to catch on fire. The fan of furious flame has no effect on magical fires such as those created by continual flame.
Hat of Anonymity: This broad-brimmed black hat obscures the wearer from being detected, allowing him to blend into a crowd with ease. The wearer is under a continous nondetection effect. Languages: Elven, Common, Undercommon; Abyssal; Aquan; Draconic; Drow Sign Language; Gnome; Goblin; Kou-toan
Personality: Rihatsu is the kind of person who does whatever his greed, hatred, and lust for destructiondrive him to do. He is hot-tempered, vicious, arbitrarily violent, and unpredictable. If he is simply out for whatever he can get, he is ruthless and brutal. If he is committed to the spread of evil and chaos, he is even worse.
Background: Rihatsu was born into a prestegious elven family. At least that is what he thought. At the age of five he began to wonder why he looked different from the other children and consulted his parents. They would tell him nothing of where he came from. When he was older he traveled to a larger city where he did research about his looks. He evntually learned that he was a drow. He then moved to the big city and began his life...
(1) Steal Sword - It is a short, but very strong sword. Special made for Wolfwood to fit his fighting style. The blade is thin, flimsy, and very strong (like stated before.) The handle is long so that you can hold it with two hands, and a guard shield at the top of the blade for when two blades meet at the base. (Basically, its like a Ninja sword.) At the bottom of the handle is a red stone which reminds Wolfwood of his battles constantly.
Special Items: The glass stone at the bottom of the sword holds the power of fire. It is wielded to the sword so as to give it power for many different attacks. Green and blue stone in my pocket. Blue is the power of water, and green holds the power of earth.
Languages: English Only
Skills: Writes Poetry, does pottery, and meditates constantly
Character Appearance- 6ft Tall, 160lbs, Black hair, Blue eyes, white skin, Wears all black, Black cloths, Leather Jacket that falls down to the heel, And Black leather boots.
Character Bio- Born in a village named Green Oak, he learned the ways of warriors. Green Oak is a warrior village. All men and women learn how to fight, protect themselves and family, and learn how to eat right and stay in shape. Wolfwood was one of the most talented in the village. His father and mother were very proud of him. Then one day, the town was attacked by an evil war lord, known as Dark Eye, who wanted to make slaves of all the people there. Despite Green Oaks great training, the Dark Eye possessed a stone of great power which gave him enough power to overthrow them. Instead of controlling them, the war lord killed them. Placing them in mines to mine out more stones, working constantly to do his bidding with little food and very little sleep. Soon, all of them died. Wolfwood however, managed to escape and train himself as well as get training from other well known villages. Wolfwood sought his revenge and killed Dark Eye for his people. Now, Wolfwood has gone neutral. Walking among the lands watching people live there lives, and stop the same thing that happened to his people.
Character Personality - Serious and warm hearted. He never gives up, never. Is pretty much always happy, but very angry and sad when he sees people suffer.
Fable: The Enchanted « Result #8 on Mar 1, 2005, 10:17pm »
This is my board and I am looking for members. If you are interested, then join. You don't even have to play Fable to join, I just want someone to play with and against.
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If you are interested, then join. You don't even have to play Fable to join, I just want someone to play with and against. ![[avatar]](http://www.planetsmilies.com/avatars/finalfantasy/finalfantasy0007.gif)
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